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Mental-health advocate offers encouragement

The Brandon Sun
May 13, 2021

A years-long addiction to alcohol led Ryan Pandolfi down a dark path he wouldn’t wish upon anyone.

It’s a story he chronicled in a recent YouTube video with the help of friend Kevin Wielenga, which he hopes will help inspire others.

These are difficult times, the Brandon-based mental health advocate said, adding he has seen firsthand how mental health has plummeted during the pandemic.

“It’s terrifying — it’s terrifying to know that people’s mental health is really diminishing.”

In a poll conducted in November, he said the majority of respondents noted they were struggling with their mental health and approximately two out of five said they were consuming more alcohol or drugs than they were prior to the pandemic.

Pandolfi would normally host a comedy event or mental health workshop through his company, The Pandolfi Initiative, to help people through these times, but health measures have prohibited public gatherings.

As such, he marked his three-year sobriety milestone on Jan. 28 by posting a video about his experience.

“Mental health being as bad as it’s ever been right now, it was a perfect opportunity to share my story,” he said by phone last week.

“People always think that they’re alone or that they’re struggling or alone. … When people hear they’re not alone in their problem, it makes them feel better.”

He credits the support from people around him with aiding in his sobriety.

On that point, he said it always takes effort, and those who wish to pursue sobriety can’t rely on others to find success.

“You’ve got to take care of yourself,” he said.

“A lot of people wait for other people to help them, but you’ve got to do the work as well.”

Pandolfi began leaning too heavily onto alcohol after his best friend died as a result of breast cancer in 2013 — a death followed four days later by her brother.

“I took that very, very, very hard,” he said in his video. “Worse than 2020, it was the worst year of my life.”

He denied he was depressed at the time and avoided social circumstances in order to spend more time drinking — an addiction he estimates cost him $100 per week.

“Drinking was 100 per cent ruining my life,” he said, adding his key turning point was when he made a conscious decision to rededicate his life to those things that made him happy.

His key piece of advice, he said in conversation with the Sun, is to “find what you did before you got into that hole. It sounds so clear, but I mean it so sincerely.”

Organizing comedy shows and other such events — gatherings intended to make people feel better — was the thing that filled the hole in his life previously, and haphazardly, occupied by alcohol.

“I’m a firm believer that humour is a medicine,” he said. “All the events I do for the community … I do to support mental health.”

An integral part of many of these shows has been comedian and fellow mental-health advocate Big Daddy Tazz (Tazz Norris), who was featured in various events, including the latest Pandolfi Initiative shows last August.

The two shows, staged at the Grand Valley Campground, came in the midst of another downturn in Pandolfi’s life.

He was going through a divorce, put his house up for sale and was laid off. That’s alongside the other pandemic-related hardships everyone else has been going through.

Rather than fall into bad habits, he practised what he preached again and started doing what he did before he was in the hole he found himself in and organized the campground comedy shows.

At the time, he said he joined Big Daddy Tazz, in declaring, “Let’s enjoy the living hell out of this,” because it was unclear when they’d be able to do it again.

Shortly after the show took place, the rug was pulled out from under Manitobans as various rounds of stricter health restrictions came into play.

No events have taken place since, and while Pandolfi said he’d enthusiastically host another show if he could, it’s unclear when or if he’ll be able to do it again.

“I would definitely be lying if I said my mental health was great,” he said. “Like everyone else, it’s been a struggle.”

To help fill this gap in his life, Pandolfi started going to the gym again, which he said has joined other silver linings in giving him hope moving forward.

“I’m doing OK,” he said. “I’m very, very blessed I get to work — a lot of people don’t have an opportunity to work at all.”

Although Pandolfi hasn’t been able to host events in recent months, he found a new means of helping people after being hired as program co-ordinator for the Helping Hands soup kitchen. He also serves as a part-time addictions support worker in downtown Brandon.

Another source of inspiration is his son, two-and-a-half-year-old Logan. He credits Logan as being the No. 1 reason he hasn’t picked up alcohol again.

“Not every day is going to be sunny, not every day is going to be cloudy,” he said. “At the end of the day, we all just want to feel purpose in life.”

Pandolfi’s video, “Laugh It Off — The Pandolfi Initiative” is available for viewing on YouTube.

“I’m hoping that video is seen by thousands of people and helps people,” Pandolfi said. “It’s all about sharing the awareness to help as many individuals as possible.”

» tclarke@brandonsun.com

» Twitter: @TylerClarkeMB

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